23

August 29, 2009

Boredom Kills; Blogging is my addiction now:) Music included though ;D

So, today was so interesting but cool. Of course, Ate&Nerd slept over last night. It was fun ! Friday was the best day ever ! Straight up though ;D First, I saw my Ate K, my guy friends kept me company in my classes, I got to hang out wit Ate&Nerd, they slept over and finally, he talked to me;) You can say that I was successful. I was smiling the whole day too, teehee. At first, I didn't think my day would turn out just how I wanted to be but then again, just don't give up cause there is always a brighter day after. I learned from the best inspirations ever. With all that is going on, I learned that to not give up, gives you better hopes in life. Doing what you dream to do and what you want to succeed in gives you the best feeling. Even though you may have those days, just know that the people you love and cherish will always be beside you the whole way. Don't ever think your alone cause no one is ever alone. We go through everything together one step at a time. Even if you don't succeed at first, you learn and know what to do next. Be the bigger person in the situation. Know that everything happens for a reason. Don't trip about other people, just continue on what you do for the best and not what other people want you to do. Peer pressure ? Yawp, thas what im talking about. Don't ever let that happen to you. Even if you think its "cool", trust me, it isn't. Remember, even if you do one simple thing wrong, it ruins everything. You learn from it and move on. I experienced everything so don't judge me by what you hear or saw. Know who I stand for and what I believe in. Anyone can judge but always know how it makes the other person feel after. Trust in yourself cause low self esteem is bad. I know, I sound like a adult(x But I just know what to say cause I experienced it all. Need advice ? Just come to me anytime:) Well, thas all for now. Stay Focused&Be Positive kids mmkays ?

22

Date : August 29, 2009

Second Week Past ;

Damn, another week passed ?! Man, I can't believe im still alive xD LOL. Jkeeeeding(: Well, this week went by fast o.o I thought it would go by slow cause of everything but it went .. Pretty well ? Im used to my classes but not my teachers of course. I made a new friend(: He is cool but stupid xD LOL. But today, I mean yesterday .. Someone switched their first period to my class. I really don't like him. We get along but I just don't like him. FAS and him had them days. Well, the other hand. Second period is getting better. Its funny(x Lunch is the usual. Fourth period is getting better but stupid at times. J&J are cool:) They make me productive in class now xD They care about me LOL. Fifth period is the usual. Funny&retarted but fun ;D J&J didn't get my my cooookie or Starbucks D; LOl. We kid around a lot as you noticed. Hm .. What else happened. OH, yesterday when I was walking to first period. Guess who I saw ?! My Ate K came up to me ! I didn't even notice her at first(x We started talking but eventually we had to go to class so we just said goodbye and hugged(: She has pe and I had English so yeah. At least we got to see each other for the first time ! I was happy. Yesterday was the bestest day ever ! I got to see my Ate K, my guy friends kept me company in my classes, &last but not least, I got to hang out wit my Ate&Nerd ! After school, I walked all the waaaay to her house [it was far >.<] and we went to the park wit her friend. Nerd stayed home cause she is ghey like that. LOl. Then we dropped off her friend and went to my house. I was supposed to sleep over her house but my parents said that they should sleep over here. &her parents said yes too(: We were on the computer and guess who FINALLY signed on ?! It was him. When he signed on, [no lie] I was hyperventilating at first cause I didn't talk to him in a while and I really missed him. He was talking to Ate on her aim [we were on the same computer xD] then he IMed me. I was like "omg, he's talking to me !" I was happy though:) He made my day ! LOL. Then we made a chat room wit the FAS [without BFFAAE&Pamangkin&SOB]. It was so funny ! LMAO. Omg, I wished I could have saved the conversation but SOMEONEOVERHERE forgot to remind me xD LOl. Well, at least we got to talk and stuff. But he had to go so we said that we would wait for him so now we are staying up for him. I think it's worth it IF he signs on:) So now im talking to Ate's future boofriend(x He is such a .. Loser ? LOl. I don't know but somewhat I guess. OH, I had to take pictures on Wednesday. You can see all my pictures on my "Rawr" blog. I'll probably post it up later or so. Lol. Everyone said my picture is cute but I don't like it xD I don't know, im pretty picky about my pictures LOl. Yes, I know, im a weirdo:) Tankyouverymuch ! My background was red of course. You could of known too. Hm .. What else to say .. OH, im sorry, how was your day sweetie ?(: If you ask me, I think your pretty cute ;D LOl, im weird xD Ate's bestest day was yesterday too :D I know it was, cause she saw and talked to people too ! LOl. Well, overall, this week was better than last weeks. Teehee ! OH, I webcamed Foodwhore. It was funny xD &he finally saw how Ate&Nerd looks like. So, he called me a fatty cause he saw me eating ice cream. LOl. But yeah .. Hm .. I think thas all ? If im missing something, ill edit later. Stay Focused&Be Positive mmkays kids ?

21

Date : August 25, 2009

To Get Things Outta My System ;

'Cause if you haven't noticed, im the type that never gives up. If I say "Always&Forever", I mean it. Not like your b/s saying "give up". Fck that, I KNOW you. That is NOT you. If deleting me from everything makes you happy ? FCK IT. I thought we would try to make it even work out still. 1 month passed by and I still haven't seen or heard anything that would make it up. "There's another reason behind the break up but he told me not to tell you and I promised him I won't" WTF is that about ? I've been waiting for like twofeakingmonths and I still didn't get the message. What is really going on with you ? I really wanted to work it out and all but I guess your the one who won't comprehend. If you have to tell me something, tell me straight up. If you think it might hurt me, JUSTDOIT. Im already hurt so might as well just face it now right ? I was even thinking of waiting till a miracle happens but you know what, I don't even know anymore. Yeah, im still gonna wish for that but not all of my hopes are going up for that. Yeah, I am getting hurt but fck it. I think its worth it ? I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE. "Keep your head up no matter what cause maybe there is a brighter side in the end." Im willing to keep my promise and im hoping you would. With all thas going on, I don't even know how im going to do that. You won't even talk to me or reply to me. It's like were strangers nowadays. Am I really that contagious ? "We can still be friends." WhattaLie. Your just one big LIE. I thought I really wanted to be with you forever but you broke my heart. Yeah, I still love you. Why ? Cause we had helluh memories together ; Fck, why do I feel bad ? You HAD a realest but I guess you just threw it away like you can just easily throw away a paper. I thought my life would been like crap without you. But .. The way I look at it. It doesn't look like crap. It just feels like im missing something important. Don't say im sprung cause clearly, im not trying to talk to you. I want you to come to me. "Patience is a virtue." Yeah, I know that. Thas why im willing to wait and see what happens.Why do we love the ones who hurt us, hurt the ones who loves us, ignore the ones who adore us, and adore the ones who ignore us? Even though your not reading this and you don't give a fck, I miss you. Even though your a jerk and broke up wit me, I love you. Because we actually ALMOST lasted. Because your the one who stood by me when everyone was walking out on me. Because I came to you for anythang and you saved me. Because when we were together, it felt like nothing else was around me except you. Because .. Thas how much I love you.

Haaaappy 10 Months Pamangkin:) Your my baby no matter what mmkays sweetie.

To The One That Knows Me The Best ;

Date : August 22, 2009

Dear Foodwhore ,


Heeeey:) Sup ? Lol. Well, I told you I would make you a "letter" type on blogspot(x Well yeah. I just wanted to say tank you for everythang you done for me. You did a lot. All those sacrifices and promises, it means a lot to me. I know I gave you some hard times but I promise you, that will never happen again. I know you want me to tell you everythang, but at times, I might have to keep them to myself to protect you, you know ? Well, we've been friends for 9 years. Thas a miracle xD Let's tank the people for making electronics :D *clap* *clap* *clap* LMAO. Damn, I have a lot of nicknames for you ahaha : Best Friend, Kuya, Foodwhore, Bitch, Slut, Loser, Everythang, SAB, &more. LOL, I made like 12 nicknames for you. They suit you though ;D Ahaha. Your like my Frisco buddy too ! With Danielle of course(: St. Charles Borremeo [Kindergarten] was the first time when we met. You liked me first(x I just thought you were adorable ahaha. &the story about how people found out you liked me LOL. Nice story huh ? xD Well, even though it wasn't meant to be for now, its Kuya&Ading all the waaaay ! Fck what people say, we're the fcking best nigguh ;D Ahaha. I love our late night calls. Its funny lol. Cause its fun making fun of you. You know why ? BECAUSE YOUR A FATTY ! Ahaha. Jkeeeeding. ... Maybe ? ... Ahaha. Well, you should be used to me calling you a fatty. &thas how I made Foodwhore :D Oh yes, im cool ! Lol. Our Frisco kick its are fun cause we always do our usual thing. METREON&YERBA BUENA GARDENS ! Lol. Its all good(: Damn though, imma miss those Frisco Kick Its. Summer was fun but now its over ): So sad .. Let's just hope we get to kick it sometime soon, yeah ? Our families like each other and whatnot xD Thas how cool we are though. Pwuahaha. You know me helluh well though. Its like we been Kuya&Ading since birth ahaha. You wish xDD Well, I don't know how long imma write but imma be random now. Lalala .. I just went to Fairfield to visit my cousins. OH, my Tita bought me a purple scarf from Disneyland, Florida ;D Its helluh cute though ! Lol. OH YEAH, tanks for the gifts when you went to Disneyland(: Your the best ! Teehee. Im so bored at home. Mommy&Daddy are gone, Kuya is in his room, Sebastian is sleeping and im just downstairs on the computer. Ghey xD Ahaha. I wanted to kick it wit my mains today but I don't know. OMG, let's hope I can go bowling wit all my cousins tomorrow ! Hm .. What else to say .. I guess thas all ? OH. I love you, always&forever Kuya. Till the end nigguh:) Ahaha.

Sincerely, AnnjeanetteLynneFortuno "Ading":)

They Made My Day:)

Ateeee - 9:16pm : aha of course she does! my adinggg's got steeeeeze. ahaa


_I Love Her Eternally Forever<3













SOB - 10:13pm : ADD people are losers

_Cause I asked him to say that(: He even posted it up on his status ! Damn my SOB's cool(x

20

August 21, 2009

Friday ; I can't belive I lasted.

Dang, I lasted this whole week of school xD At first it was slow but now, its Friday, I think it went by pretty quickly don't you think ? Well, just thinking about school and whatnot in school keeps me occupied without those other things I mainly think about. Being occupied is better than doing nothing so I guess going back to school is good. I have to focus a lot on school for now to keep my grades up the rest of the year. Im looking forward to learning a lot more and making new friends:) Stay active ! Thas the main thing(x Well, what else to say .. My week was okay I guess. Better than usual. Classes are boring except AVID so I have to get used to them. Im doing my work on time and making sure I don't get distracted. I always get hungry in Science xD &thas my 4th period class, right after lunch LOL. Yes, im a weirdo &im proud bxtch ;D LMAO. Sorry, I talk a lot about myself, how was your week sweetie ?;) Teehee. People are changing but I hope for the better [even though it may not seem like it]. Im trying to keep myself on check everyday wit my "everyday schedule" so wanna help out a girl ? Lol. Man, I can't believe I lasted though ! I've always been thinking if im still going to keep "the promise" .. Should I though ? IS it worth it ? *Sigh* .. A month or 2 past .. But im not going to give up until I know the reason why to. No matter what you say or do, I'll always love you. Im not sprung over that much, just a tad bit. I still have those memories in my heart and I always think about those times. Many people remind me about those times but no tear drop falls out of my eyes. I keep them inside cause I guess the pain is worth it ? We did have some pretty good times. *Sigh* I just wonder if it's still worth it &if there is by any chance another second time ... ? Anyways : Supposed to do the "Friday Kick It" but everyone is busy, especially me. I hope to see you ladies tomorrow or next week hopefully ?(; Let's hope ! Lol. Hey, I know im a nerd so tanks for the compliment sweetie ;D Im not conceited, just like to play around a lot at times. Thas why you should get to know me, yes ? Ahaha. Jkeeeeding. Im not forcing you, just asking tankyouverymuch(: But yeah .. So I can say, overall, this week was okay. I hope next week will get a lito better. But I know its going to be hectic wit school work and whatnot. Thas all for now. Stay Focused&Be Positive mmkays kids ?

19

Date : August 20, 2009

Right now ;

"Don’t say you love me unless you really mean it, because I might do something crazy like believe it."

"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be."

"Love is as much of an object as an obsession, everybody wants it, everybody seeks it, but few ever achieve it, those who do will cherish it, be lost in it, and among all, never... never forget it."

"Love is never wanting to lose faith, never wanting to give up, and never truly moving on. Love is knowing and praying in the deepest part of what's left of your heart that they feel the same."

"They say loving you gives pains and full of sacrifices But I'll rather take pains and lots of sacrifices than not to be love by you."

"Love is a promise, love is a souvenir, once given never forgotten, never let it disappear."

"LOVE: We think about it, Sing about it, Dream about it && Loose sleep worrying about it. When we don't know we have it, we search for it. When we discover it, we don't know what to do with it. When we have it, we fear loosing it. It is the constant source of pleasure and pain. But we don't know which it will be from one moment to the next. It is a short word, easy to spell, difficult to define && IMPOSSIBLE to live without."

"A wise girl kisses but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left."

"Just because somebody doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have."

"True love never dies, even if you have found a new love, the sweet memory of the past will continue to hunt you for the rest of your life."

"Everyone says love hurts, but that isn't true. Loneliness hurts. Rejection hurts. Losing someone hurts. Envy hurts. Everyone gets these things confused with love, but in reality love is the only thing in this world that covers up all pain and makes someone feel wonderful again. Love is the only thing in this world that does not hurt."

"Boys are like stars, there are millions of them out there, but only one can make your dreams come true."

"Love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs. Being purged, a fire sparkling in lovers eyes. Being vexed, a sea nourished with lovers tears. What is it else? A madness most discreet, a choking gall and a preserving sweet."

More to come ..
AnnjeanetteLynne ; Status Away Message : "Don’t say you love me unless you really mean it, because I might do something crazy like believe it."

[17:53] Brother-In-Law : I love you! =D
[17:53] Brother-In-Law : and i MEAN IT!




_'Cause I couldv'e relate ..

18

Date : August 17, 2009

Freshman Year ! Class of 2010:)

First things first, summer overall was okay but didn't turn out to be what I planned. So, today was first day of Freshman year. I was scared and nervous at first but it wasn't so bad. So when I came to school, I waited for Pamangkin in the back of the high school. OH, did I mention mommy dropped Kuya&I off today ?(; Well, Pamangkin came so we went in the cafeteria to get our schedules. When we were in line, BFFAAE came. Of course I waited for her after I got my schedule. So after we got our schedule, we went outside cause it was crowded and it was almost time to go. So we had to go to Advocacy first. BFFAAE&I had advocacy class together cause of AVID ;D I knew most of the people there of course lol. First period was English. I knew 4 people in that class. I usually don't talk to them but they talked to me so it was okay. Second period was Algebra and BFFAAE&I had that class together too ;D I knew most of the people there. Third period was lunch and I thought I wasn't going to know anyone there but I came across my granddaughter while going to lunch and she said she had lunch wit me so it was all good(: BFFAAE&Pamangkin had fourth period lunch so that was ghey D: Granddaughter was my lunch buddy as well as others. Lunch was soo ghey cause we were so used to having everyone we know at lunch but now its different of course. I knew some guys at lunch who are in different grades which was so weird xD So at lunch, we just kept talking about the classes and gdaughter was criticizing people lmao. Fourth period was Science. I knew some people in that class too. We got our text books and whatnot. Then fifth period was AVID. It was the best ! I will always look forward to fifth period(: Cause I knew everyone there and of course BFFAAE was there too ;D Overall, my day was not exactly what I thought in the beginning but it was okay for the first day, not as bad. Well, I only stay at MTHS for 2 weeks them im moving so its going to be a hassle for me =/ OH, also did I mention I got a haircut over the weekend and new clothes on the weekend ? Well, yes I did(: Lol. Just a reminder, school is beginning so I might not make blogs everyday. Probably Fridays and weekends or so. Of course first year of high school is important so I gotta get my grades up and pass. I just finished my homework and talking to Ate. OMG, it was so weird going to school without Ate&Nerd though ! Im so used to going to school wit them and hanging out wit them and whatnot. But now, without them, I feel different. Well, hopefully we'll get together as usual(: We still have our Friday kick it's so its all good:) Teehee. Well, thas all for now. Stay focused&Be positive mmkays kids ?

17

Date : August 14, 2009

Live It Up, Do It Big ;D

DAMN, what a night I had(x So first is first, Ate&Nerd slept over last night. They came over in the afternoon so we worked out, kicked it and what not. We were mostly in the backyard the whole time xD Overall = FUN ! We had the deep conversation ; half after working out and half at night. I finally got everything off my chest to Ate to tell her what I feel about 'it'. THEN she told me things that I never heard before. I was pissed but oh well, it was 7th grade days. The past was the past, you can't change it now. After diner, we worked out again and stayed outside till 10 pm ish. It felt good outside. A couple things happened out there but you know, over all it was funny. We played truth or dare outside before going back in xD Nerd was going OFF ! She just kept coming up wit the nasty est things ever LOL. So then we got tired and went back in. We washed off before getting ready to watch movies. We watched the movies in my kuya's room cause he wasn't at home, no one could here us scream and then we slept there too xD We watched The Unborn, Uninvited, The Haunting In Connecticut &Saw V. We watched The Hangover after the Uninvited to calm us down xD Damn, we felt successful after we watched all that ! LOL. Of course we drank and what not. We were just so hyper and out of it. We kept eating chips and stuff. Yes, I know, fatties much right ?(: That was my 4th time drinking this summer ! We slept at 5 am cause we passed out xD We were supposed to do a all nighter but I guess we passed out. When we woke up, weirdest shit happened. Nerd had a scare, my head was hurting like fck and Ate didn't remember anythang either ! Lmao. None of us remembered what happened. HANGOVER ! LOL. But, Ate&Nerd left around 5 pm something xD Right now, my head is still hurting and im just waiting for my mommy and kuya to come home. Well, I lived it up last night ;D

Haaaappy Belated 7 Months Best Friend Abraham !

16

Date : August 12, 2009

Living the Single Life

So .. BestFriend broke up wit me last night [Tuesday] around 10 ish ? Yes, I cried but not as much. Yes, I was sad but im getting over it. I just need to think about other stuff for a while. But im just saying ; WOW, 2 break ups in 1 summer ? WHATTA SUMMER HUH ? Yes. Anyways, so I know everything happens for a reason. I knew this was going to happen so at least I knew right ? SAB's though right Khaila ?(x So, this morning [12 - 5 AM] there was supposed to be a meteor shower and Ate, Nerd and I were on the phone. I was looking out the window and they were outside. We didn't see anythang except stars xD Ghey ! LOL. Well, at least I had laughs last night. Tanks to Ate(: She comforted me while I was crying. I know I can always count on her. I was talking to her, deep conversation, and we were helluh thinking. Things were too good to be true. OH, Nerd helped too xD Im tired of life. But no matter what we do, we can't stop life. Its like, impossible. Im tired of hearing the same shit over and over again. Its getting old. Im tired of lies and breaking of promises. PROMISE is a PROMISE. Fck you. I feel like im done but im not. There is something else to do but I dont know. "My heart speaks first and it's telling me to Love You". No matter what I do to forget about everything, there is just that something inside of me that won't let go. What happened to Always&Forever ? It was a lie -_- Not to me, it was forever promise. But to you ? I don't know. I dont know anymore. Its confusing. Imma just keep my head and up still keeping my promise to everyone about that one promise. Even though it may be hard but imma still go for it. No matter how hard I have to try, I want things to be the same like old days. Giving up isn't in my vocabulary, not even in the FAS vocabulary. I thought things would fix itself but, I guess I was the fool. Somethings you have to make it happen and the most important one is that you have to be there. Even though im going through a lot, im still going to put my problems aside for my love ones. No matter what im going through, they are first in my list. Fck my problems, my love ones mean the most to me and its an Always&Forever wit them:) Easier said than done right ? Yes. Just gotta take it one step at a time ;

Haaaappy Birthday SDCMFFAAE/Daughter ! Mahal Kita:)

15

Date : August 11, 2009

Unexpected(x

So, today was ..(x Lol. I thought it was going to be like usual cause mommy didn't go to work. But then when Sebastian was taking his nap and I was going to take my nap, my mommy and daddy called me to go down cause they wanted to talk to me. So first, they asked me about the last kick it wit Danielle&BestFriend Christian. THEN they asked me about HIM. I was like, whattheheck ?! SO RANDOM. I told them about how he used to take me out and take care of me well. They like him(: They APPROVE of HIM. Man, best news(x BUT, im not going out wit him anymore ... After I told them everything, my mommy asked if I wanted to go shopping and of course I said yes ;D I didn't get a lot but just some jeans and shirts. I was happy cause at least I got something new for school:) Lol. So, we only went out for about 2 - 3 hours. After I told them about HIM, I was thinking about how everything used to be when HE was still wit me .. Damn, I miss those days .. Im not giving up though ;D Cause I promised I won't give up. HE was a good boyfriend. I really Love HIM. HE toke care of me well and never did anything that I would think of him as a failure. HE was the best ! A real gentlemen though:) Even though we're not going out, I still think of him as the best. Don't judge me wrong please xD Well, that was basically my day. So short right ? LOL. I promise I'll probably write more some time tomorrow or so ? xD We'll see ;D OH, one more thing ...

Haaaappy Birthday Angeline Sky ! I love you cousin<3

14

Date : August 10, 2009

Today was .. Productive ?

So, today was the High School Orientation for MTHS. I walked to school at 8:45 and when I got there, the first person I saw was Madre :D &she came up to me and was glad that I was going there wit her(x BUT, its only "temporary". Cause I don't know when im moving. Its hard but I gotta adjust. Well, then I met up wit BFFAAE &Pamangkin(: Well, we went in like at 9 and started the whole Orientation. We were split up in groups but at least it was kinda fun ? Lol. Well, I was in group 17 wit Sonia, Rebekah, Joceline and others. We did different activities in the class room until 12 and then started the tour around the campus. Our Leaders were wow xD They were funny lol. No one changed though. Well, few had haircuts and such but they are still the same. But when people saw me, the first thing they asked was "how are you&josh ?" .. Damn, when I heard that, I was like .. Wow .. I wanted to cry D; Of course everyone knew cause we WERE the couple of the school. *Sigh* Those WERE the days .. Well, of course I saw BFFAAE&Pamangkin around the campus so it was all good(x But when I saw Kenji still wit Teresa .. I was like DAMN. I thought Josh&I were going to last like them .. The weird part was that some people didn't come though. Oh well, probably see them next week ? Hope so. I had to walk back and it was HOT. I was sweating and shit xD When I got home, I saw my cousin Khaila, her boyfriend and my Tito getting their stuff. But damn, I went upstairs and changed cause it was fcking hot xDD Then I went on the computer, called Ate to tell her everything and we had a deep conversation ..): &then ate, then toke a nap(: Well, you can say my day was productive. I wanted to cry my eyes out today .. It made me reminisce about those days wit him .. Man .. How I wish I can go back in time ... But no one can ever go back, just gotta wish for the best. But I know there is still a chance so im not giving up. I can do this(: Right ? Lol.

13

Date : August 07, 2009

'Cause it hurts so much ..

Im trying to forget about you but then again I can't. I just love you so much. All those memories we had , some are fading away but I won't forget the day. The day you asked me out .. Even though you hurt me so much by saying to "give up" , im never going to give up. We've been through helluh shit together and just to give that up like this ? I dont think so. I've cried helluh times cause of you but then again I love you. Everyone said you are the one for me ; Were they right ? Looking back to what we had : yes. You are the one for me, but now, I have to say "were" .. Even though we're not together no more, always remember this : I Love You. Mahal Kita. Saranghae. I know I say "I hate you" at times but deep down, I know thas not true. We lasted 9 months. 9 MONTHS. I thought we were going to last forever, but to you, I guess forever was a lie .. If you still had/have feeling for me, why didn't you try to help me save this relationship ? Why did you have to give this up so fast ? I admit, even though im going out wit someone else, I still love and care about you. He even knows that. We even talked about it ; Maybe we were just meant to be friends. Cause all I can think about is you&how we used to be. Do you think its to late ? Do you think we can fix this ? Im willing to. I love you so much. I just still can't believe your gone. I thought this love was a sure thang .. I can never erase the memories we had together. All those long walks, talks, BIG loooong hugs, &more .. I just miss them a lot. Even though those days are long gone, they aren't that far away from my heart. You said you would never break my heart but then again, you did. Why ? What was the real reason behind the break up ? I would like to know. I mean. I would LOVE to know. Am I mad at you ? Im pissed at you. But that doesn't mean I literally hate you. I know im confusing at times but you used to help me through this. Now that your gone and not talking to me, I feel lost and confused. I always try to talk to you when your on but .. I guess im .. Scared. Why don't YOU try talking to me ? Im not a disease or anythang like that. Would you ever think that ? ARE you thinking that ? IF you are, thas fcked. I've gave up a lot for this relationship and it was going well until you HAD to break it off. Yeah, I know, your going through a lot. But, would it matter if you just help out ? I admit, you caused a lot right now but im willing to help out if you want me to. I know, everyone is like pissed at you and shit but don't you ever think why they are ? Cause you made a stupid decision. Thas why. I saw a lot that I couldn't handle even though it was lito. I was pissed and I guess teared cause of that shit. Really ? You would do that ? I know, you think I moved on wit him but NO. I still think about you. You can even ask him if its true. I really thought we would make it, but I guess not. Everyday I hope something good will happen but I guess thas a fail. But .. Im willing to wait to see if a miracle would happen to me. Ateeee ! :D : just give it some time, I'm SURE he'll realize that shaawty you da best he ever had (= _Mahal Kita Ateeee<3

12

Date : August 07, 2009

Feel like venting ?

Guys are hard to understand, or lemme say "comprehend". When you tell them something important, they get all emotional and what not. Lemme just say this, its better if you talk it out than just acting like a jerk. Like really though, it makes us girls feel disappointed. When you lie, it makes us feel heart broken. When you say "always&forever" but you know its going to come out to "never", we can never forgive you for what you done. But then again .. Why do we still fall for you over and over again ? I guess when things are just too perfect you don't want to let it go. Don't you wonder why its like that ? I always do. UGH, SAB's ! Right Khaila ?(: You want to hurt them, but then again you love them too much to do such thing. You want them to die, but you can't live without them. Its COMPLICATED. Your mind says one thing but we try to listen to your heart too. Its hard to let go cause there is always something holding you back. Once you let go, everything will change. Even though change would be "better" but would you want to give up on what you had or have ? Its hard to understand at first but you have to give it some time. You just gotta hope for the best and stay strong.

11

Date : August 06, 2009

My Last Frisco Kick It Day(;

So, today was fun lol. I went to Frisco wit my mom to go kick it wit my BestFriend Christian&Danielle. Today is our Official Last Kick It D; It was sad but we had fun(x Damn. We WERE supposed to go to the Pier but they were scared we might get lost LMAO. So we just watched G - Force 3D then kicked it at Yerba Buena&Metreon. Christian came to my mom's work around 7 so we went to go pick up Danielle at her house at Daly City. We watched the movie at 11:30 at Century Theaters. It was a funny movie though ! We were like the first ones to go watch G - Force xDD It was helluh funny ! When we went in the theater we saw like NO ONE there ! We were talking helluh loud and stuff(x Then later on, 2 families came but that was it. The movie had helluh Rn B(x It was cool. After the movies, we just chilled at Yerba Buena for a while. Walked through "Memory Lane" for one more time .. ): Then off to the Arcades in Metreon ! LOL. We wasted most of our money there LMAO. But, at least we got to hang out and stuff. We didn't take any pictures this time o.o It was weird xD Maybe cause we toke helluh last time and we are tired LOL. I was supposed to make a 2 way video wit BestFriend BUT he didn't want to D: So we ended up just talking. It was okay though. I had to tell them the "truth" about what's going on wit my problem. It was hard but I finally got it out of my chest. I just need to figure it out .. I've been thinking about it ever since and I still don't know what to do. Anyways, we dropped of Danielle like around 2 and I had to get back to my mom's work before 4. I thought I was going to be late but Christian&I made it back on time ;D LOL. Overall, my day was successful but not the part when I had to think. I wish I can have kick it's like this someday soon but school is starting so it ruins it all -_- LOL. Well, that was my day(: OH, im talking to BestFriend Christian on the phone&just on the computer. Tanks to everyone who supports me in everythang, I really appreciate it wit all my heart:)

10

Date : August 04, 2009

My Day ;

Today, I got to kick it wit my BFFAAE, Ate &Pamangkin. OH, these 'fatties' came too xD So, we met up at MTHS at 11. Then we went to Pamangkin's house to give her anniversary gift that Ate&I bought for her like .. Last month ? LOL. Yes, we haven't seen each other in a loooong time D: But at least we got to see her today:) But then she had to go to MTHS for something about school so then BFFAAE, Ate&I went to the 'fatties house' to ask them if they wanted to kick it. We went to McDonald's, Starbucks, Game Stop [spent almost an hour there o.o] and then off to my house. We were supposed to go to the park after Game Stop but we were tired and helluh hot ! D: But, at least we got some good exercise xD LOL. When we were at my house, we ate, I cleaned, watched my old video's xD, played wit water in my backyard ;D, toke pictures and video's then we walked to Pamangkin's house to kick it there. We were helluh tired when we got to her house though ! OMG, we got soo tired ;o But at least we got to talk and take more pictures at her house(: We only spent like about 40 min there ? Lol. It wasn't that long but at least we got to update each other. When we came back to my house, we baked cupcakes and just went on the computer. BFFAAE had to leave at 6 so Ate&I just kept going on the computer. Then my parent's came home and Ate stayed for dinner and while my parents went to look at houses(: My day was going so great BEFORE this thing happened. I was just soo pissed though. If you want to know what happened ? ASK, im not going to post it up in public. My problems are my problems. You have to get my trust before I tell you my 'situations'. Yes, I call them b/s but of course its just life you know ? Well, Ate&I got soo helluh pissed. I was washing dishes and she was on my computer. I was washing utensils and they were sharp. I would've thrown it at something but I held it in. I just kept cussing like crazy though. I was that mad. She was scared. She thought I was going to throw it at her. Psh, I want my Ate ALIVE, not DEAD. She been there for me through everything. Anyways, that 'thing' helluh got me pissed. I guess .. Im jealous ? Damn, I can't believe I said it. I can't believe you even went there .. What happened to everything we had ? OH .. Had .. Well, I just can't stop trippin' over it cause I guess im .. Sprung over you ? *Sigh* I don't know anymore .. I mean like, I want the best for you and all but doing all those stuff ? That just goes far. I want to talk to you but I guess I don't have the courage too. I know I can do it but im just .. Scared .. Scared of what might happen next .. Wow, I guess it is true ; 'Depression' is spreading in the family .. Im always scared of what might happen next. I know, if you really love someone, you would give up something. But, I don't know what should I do .. I just care so much about you. I don't want to put you in situations anymore .. Im tired of hurting you in some way .. But, I just can't let go of you .. Everyday .. Im trying my best to forget about you one step at a time but .. But I guess I can't forget about you .. We've been through helluh situations together and its hard to let go of the person you love. This just caught my attention & Ate also thinks it relates ;

“ Guys are assholes. If you argue with him, you’re hard-headed. If you’re quiet, you don’t care. If you call him, you’re too clingy crazy. If he calls you, he says you should be happy. If you don’t love him, he’ll try to win you. When you do love him, he leaves. If you don’t fuck him, you’re a tease. If you do, you’re easy. You tell him your problems, he says you’re irritating. If you don’t, he says you don’t trust him. If you lecture him, you just want to argue. If he lectures you, it’s because he ‘cares.’ If you break a promise, he doesn’t trust you anymore. If he breaks it, it’s because he had to. If you cheat, he expects it to be over. If he cheats, he wants another chance. THEY’RE ALL BASICALLY THE SAME. Guys drink to forget about girls; girls drink to think back about the guy. When guys are in love, they become poor; when girls are in love, they become pretty. Guys can forget, but can’t forgive; girls can forgive, but can’t forget. When guys are heart-broken, they try to forget about the girl by going out with another girl; when girls are heart-broken, they try to find his characteristics in another guy. Guys wish to be her first love; girls wish to be his last"
- unknown

I just feel .. Lost right now .. I can't think straight. Its just hard for me. All this is just happening at once. I can't take it no more ! I want the old days back &how we used to be. Why can't we go back to those days ? Why did you have to give up so easily. I wanted to work it out but you just said "give up". I really cared about you and how I wanted things to work out, I guess I was just fooling myself. iPromised, I Loved You, I Cared about You. What do I get back ? THIS. ALL OF THIS B/S. That is just not fair ! But then again, life isn't fair. We never know the real meaning till we figure it out ..

09

Date : August 04, 2009

Updating Myself Though ;

AnnjeanetteLynneFortuno. May23. Filipino. Incoming Freshman. Staying Focused. A Promise is a Promise. Getting my priorities straight in life. Learning from my mistakes from the past. Im looking forward to a new start in High School, [hopefully] go back to the Philippines in May 2010 w/ Ate Leigh Anne:), &start being a bigger person and learn from all of this. My Heroes are the ones who seen me in my worse scenarios and who like me for who I am. My Family, Rawr Boo Bluhd &F.A.S. are my family. Drama is straight up b/s to me. I like to keep it clean. When it comes to parties, its 21&up for me though ;D Once you get to know me, I get loud(x Im shy but nice(: Music is my addiction. Gotta listen to it 24/7. Electronics are my bestfraaaand(: lol. I think lito kids are adorable ! [no pedo though ;D] Keeping myself in check everyday. Friends are my lovers. Gotta love them though ! Kickin' it at San Fransisco and other places. Hit me up &let's make plans shall we ?(; When I say 'I love you', I mean it. Don't play wit my heart cause I break easily. Independent though. I don't like depending on others cause you have to earn my trust before anythang. Camera whore ? Probably .. xD LOL. Jkaaaay, just when kickin' it cause I love them memories:) I love to go down memory lane a lot cause I don't want those times to fade away. Red is my favorite color. Don't ask why(x Blogspot is my favorite site to vent. Myspace is old. Aim is a must. Music is a everyday thang. Youtube is cool too. Im a cwalker. I don't cwalk everyday cause I have better things to do. AJxbaybe is my youtube account. Check out my video's ?(: Pwease&Tank Yous. Teehee. AnnjeanetteLynne is my SN. Let's talk ?(: Follow me in blogspot though ! Lol. Well, thas all for now. Kbyeeee<3

08

Date : August 1, 2009

St. Charles ;Olden Days ..

St. Charles has been the best school ever ! I've been going to St.Charles Kindergarten - 3rd grade. I moved for 4th grade cause we couldn't pay for the tuition no more): Yes, it is a private school. We had to wear uniforms and all that, but except the uniforms, it was the best school EVER(: I've met a lot of new friends and learned a lot too. Kindergarten ; Thas where it all started. I met all my friends and especially, my #1BestFriend, Christian ! We had this program and it was a dance. We were partnered up and at first, Christian wasn't my partner. Our teacher, St. Genevieve, switched us around a lot and then I ended up wit Christian. Ever since Christian told Angelina his "secret", she told the whole class and I don't remember knowing he liked me till he told me like WAAAAY later on xD Yes, I lose my memories a lot BUT at least, I remembered my Kindergarten days:) Anyways, we were like the "School Cutest Couple". Everyone wanted to hook us up but I guess we didn't want to ? LOL xD We were just Best Friends. We didn't really get to hang out as much till 2nd grade cause thas when he left): He told me that I was the only one who gave him a goodbye gift o.o LOL. Im so thoughtful ;D Ahaha. But after he moved, I missed him oh so much D; &I hoped we could see each other again AND we did :D It was a field trip to I think Raging Waters or something and he saw me then he went up to me(: Thas the only time we got to see each other. But overall, im so lucky I met him though(: Teehee ! OH, my other Main Squeeze was Tiffany Manlapaz. I miss her soo much): I haven't seen her since she moved 2nd grade .. Man, I can't believe she moved .. Danielle [my other main squeeze], Tiffany and I were like the "Three Musketeers" though ! At first, it was just Tiffany and I but then we met Danielle(: We were the best of friends. Man, I really miss the old days .. I had so many good&fun memories at St.Charles. When I look back, im kinda the same person I was. Christian and I were talking about the old days and this is what we found out ;

Christian - "Nerd" type , wanted to be everyone's friend.
Me - "Outgoing" type, everyone wanted to be my friend and I was loud(x
Danielle - Shy&Nice but still is ;D
Tiffany - Cute&Innocent:)
Arjay - "Jock" type LOL. All the girls apparently were into him xD
Angelina - "Popular" type
Julio - Rich boy xDD

We only went that far LOL. St. Charles really changed. Christian and I want to go back and visit St.Charles cause apparently, we have "our spot" where we hung out his last day. Yawp , a lot of memories .. I can say A LOT about St.Charles but I guess thas enough for now don't you think ? I don't xD But sadly im tired &thisloser called me xD

St. Charles Borremeo forever<3