'Why do you have a boyfriend ?' [WHEN I was going out wit him ..]
We were friends wit benifits at first but then we toke it another level. Even though we were going out, we were still bestfriends. I could tell him anything and everything and he would always be there for me. I love him because he made me realize how my life is precious and he would never let me down. Even though I might not know the REAL reason to this thing called 'love' but I know that we had a special bond that I would call 'love'. Wit him by my side, knowing I have someone to go to whenever I feel like talking to someone, he would always be there for me to open up to him. Even though I had my mains to go to, he would always make me feel special everyday. He was like the best though. "Even though we aren't going out anymore, I miss him the most .." I miss how we used to be and all those memories we had. If I would go back in time, my second choice would be 8th grade. Because thas where it all started.
I love you, always&forever .. Unconditionally, I promise.
Why hello there. Yes, today is my 1 year of Blogspot. Yay, lols. The link up there is my first blog. Its boring but w/e right ? ;D So, I wont be talking about Blogspot for this whole blog since thas boring and I want to entertain you, teehee. So, people say 'Tumblr' is better than Blogspot -_- Its the same freakin' thing ! 'Tumblr' is just new in-a-way. But I love Blogspot better :D Lols. OMG, today I feel liked I was harrassed a lot ! NewFriend gave me a lapdance O_O Yes .. EWH ! I was just sitting in my seat side sattle then he put his arm on my shoulder and yeah. HE DID IT TO ME 2 TIMES ! He was like 'you know you liked it' the real answer is that ... HE IS NASTY OMG ! I had my eyes closed of course so I didn't see anything lols. Helluh people said I looked helluh red xD I was though D: Everyone was laughing and me of course even though it was NASTY ! But anyways, after school BFFAAE and I were walking and he saw us so we decided to walk wit us and his friends called him and he was like 'this is my best friend annjeanette !' I was like WOW xD Hannah was laughing lols. He had his arm around my shoulder which was weird. He kept reminding me about the 'lapdance'. Cause he said I could dance too but I don't show it cause I DON'T WANT TO. Lols. But yeah. Uhm, school today went by fast even though it was boring. I saw Ate Kimberly today after first period:) It was cool lols. We started talking and whatnot. I was so freakin' tired today, omg. Im still tired cause of the LONG weekend that was worth it ;D Ahahaha. I was texting Kuya on Sunday at like 12 but then I fell asleep on his as always(x He's used to that lols. I haven't talked to him in helluh long though cause we are busy nowadays wit school and whatnot. But I talk to him from time to time on aim. OH, on Sunday was the FAS 8 months anniversary ;D HAY ! Lols. Well, I guess thas all:) Stay Focused&Be Positive Kids mmkays ?
HAY:) How was your week sweetie ? Mine was good, tanks for asking ;D Well, my classes are getting better. I got extra credit for some of my classes. YES ! LOls. The only part that ruined my week was when problems started to come in. Helluh fcking ghey ... People want to start drama wit me already. DUDe, if you wanna fade, let's go. I hate when people get in your business. Friday, Saturday &today, Sunday is the best:) Friday, I got to hang out wit my Ate&Nerd. It was also Pamangkin&I's 11 months anniversary:) SOB&Fa was supposed to walk me to Florin. So when I got to their house, they said they were sick and I had to go by myself D; I started walking away sad and tired so then I thought that I should just go home. When I just got out of their street, Fa on his bike came and asked if I wanted him to peg me so it was nice of him(: We got to hang out while going to Florin. When we reached Isabelle Jackson, we saw Ate, Nerd and their boyfriends. So it was unexpected xD I felt like a third wheeler though cause I have no boyfriend of course. Oh well .. Now I know how they felt when I was wit him .. Made me think a lot though. So then we started heading for Ate&Nerd's house so we girls could get ready. The guys were just outside. Ate's boyfriend had to leave so it was Nerd's boyfriend&Fa outside waiting for us. It was the first time meeting Nerd's boyfriend and he's cool xD BUT he moves too fast -_- After we girls got ready, we had to drop off Nerd's boyfriend at Florin but then we all didn't want to go cause I was tired so Nerd, her boyfriend and Fa went to drop him off. Ate&I stayed at Toby Johnson Park, talked, layed down and toke pictures ;D When Nerd&Fa came back, we told Fa to go home and get some rest since he was sick. Then us girls started to head to their house so they could ask their parents if they can sleep over my house. I was supposed to sleep over their house but my parents said that we were looking at houses on Saturday. So we waited for their mom to come back and decided to just go on the computer. When their mom came, her parents said yes so they packed quickly and we headed for my house. When we arrived at my house, my brother, daddy&my lito brother went to go pick up my mommy. Ate, Nerd&I decided to take LOTS of pictures in my bathroom and then we went downstairs to set up the table and go on the computer as always. When my parents and brother's came back, we ate and watched the last show of Tayong Dalawa. OMG, Nerd, mommy&I cried ! After the show and eating, I had a cuss fight wit Ate's boyfriend cause he was getting on my last nerves. Then after that, we went outside to talk and in my car and toke pictures. We were tired so we headed up to my room and slept like at 12 cause we had to wake up early on Saturday. Saturday was Ate&I's 1 year&11 months anniversary:) We went to the Key Club breakfast thingy at MTHS so we woke up at 7 and got ready then walked. We waited for Pamangkin cause she had my money. We couldn't pay at the door so Ate, Nerd&I just decided to give my ticket away, get my money and walked towards SOB&Fa's house cause it reminded us about the 8th grade morning 'adventures' ;D After walking towards their house, we went to MTHS again, saw helluh people and just left to my house. When we got to my house, my daddy&Kuya left somewhere so mommy cooked for us. We girls talked about the house problem and whatnot. Then after, Ate, Nerd&I went on the computer and watched the beginning of Grudge 2 because Kuya came and said that we are going to Fairfield so I toke a shower and Ate&Nerd waited. After we got done getting ready, mommy, Kuya, Sebastian, Ate, Nerd&I went to Fairfield. It was Nerd's first time going cause Ate already been there. When we got their, Khaila and Oliver went somewhere. I guess double date ? LOls ! Well, we bonded wit my cousins and toke helluh pictures wit Pita:) We only got to stay there till 4 cause we needed to go home so Ate, Nerd&I could go to their homecoming at 5. So then we headed back to Ate&Nerd's house. Arrived at 5:30. We got ready helluh quick so we could met up wit Nerd's boyfriend at the library. When we got to the school, I saw my old friends from Anna Kirchgator&&&my cooool buddy ;D Jacky noticed me and we gave each other a big hug xD Lols ! When we saw Nerd's boyfriend, he was wit his friend so we decided to head for the line to get in. When we got to the door, their was helluh cute asians OMG ;D Lols ! But then Nerd kept telling them that 'im waiting'. I am but I dont know if he still likes me or not. I don't want to tell the rest of the details cause trust me, it was GHEY -_- I met new friends:) Shawn [if he spells it like that] talked to me and waited wit me cause he had the same reason as me. He was cute though but I don't know if he's wit my friend Jacky. After that night, we went home at 9:30 ish ? We went on the computer, uploaded the pictures on Nerd's myspace and headed for bed at 1 ish ? Lols. On Sunday, today, we went to church at 11. We saw people:) Lols. Then after church we went to Rileys to get food then headed to their house. When we got to their house, we got home and ate. Then I had to leave at 1:30 so then their dad dropped me off home. Overall, my weekend was fun. How was yours ? Stay Focused&Be Positive Kids mmkays ?
It still might take a few more days for your life to return to normal, for you have recently been on a wild ride. You are being given a chance to think about your experiences and decide what to do next. Just remember that it's easy for you now to make nearly anything look bigger, better or more important than it truly is. Bringing yourself back to reality is healthier than waiting for someone else to do it for you.
You may not care about the date but even though, I just wanna say tanks for all those times when you made me happy and actually smile. Sorry for everything I caused .. And those times I made you feel bad, mad, etc .. Even though we're not together, I love you. Always remember that. Pwease ..
September 19, 2009 @ 11:30 pm
'Cause it still seems like it was just last year .. When everything was alright .. Nothing to worry about .. Until now .."It's not about holding on, it's about not letting go .."
Yes, just a lito shout out to my 'ex brother - in - law' cause today he turned 15. Shoot, his ass is helluh old:) Ahaha. But he's cool ! Yawp. Well, this week was the fifth week of school. This term went by fast. Almost second term ! Trying get my grades to stay in the 'A' range but it's not working ): Im helluh stressed nowadays. Can't even concentrate on school. I know, school first but too many things getting in my way. Helluh annoying. Well, this week, second period keeps getting better everyday ;D I helluh love my second period. Good thing I have it all year long ;D Imma miss it though next year. But like today, my 'new friend' wasn't here so today was too chill in second period D; Nothing to laugh to. &I was looking forward to second period today since it was Friday. So, school is school. Lot's of homework. Classes still chill for now. Eh, school is boring. I only go cause second period ! &lunch wit granddaughter of course. Yesterday was a miracle. Tank you Josh, for the talk:) Thas what I needed to hear. I had like a 'deep conversation' wit him last night. I wanted to webcam him but he had to go and my webcam was freakin' retarted xD Sorry about that. I won't remember what he told me. Guess what today is kids ? Its the eighteenth. Kuya ; don't you remember ? Well, yeah. Today we had Freshman BBQ for only freshman's. it was cool:) After school, BFFAAE&I went to go wait for her mom so she could put her stuff in the car then we waited for Ate&Nerd to come. They came wit there friend Brenda. The one that looks like Pamangkin xD We all headed to the Freshman BBQ to get food xD Yes, we only went to get food ;D Then everyone got to see Ate&Nerd. Then off to Fa's house ! When we were walking, we saw 'ex brother - in - law #2' wit Fredy and that other guy xD Then after we said hi, we continued going to Fa's house. When we got there, I said Happy Birthday to SOB ;D Cause im nice lol. Then SOB, Fa, &Cristian followed us to the Freshman BBQ. I was supposed to kick it wit Fa&SOB but Cristian was wit them so whatever -_- Ruined my plans ! Anyways, when we came back, BFFAAE had to go D; So Ate, Nerd, Brenda&I went back to the Freshman BBQ and just hung out there. Ate&I got to talk to Tino on the phone ! OMG, his voice got deeper xD I missed him ! Last time I saw him was 7th grade D; BUT, he's moving to MTHS Christmas Break ! YAY ;D Ate&I's lito brother is coming back ! Im so happy:) Then unfortunately, we had to go home. So they walked home&I walked home alone. So overall, my day was okay. LOls. Tomorrow, I have CFF then off to Daly City then visit the cousins. OH, the 28th is my 1 year of blogspot ! Of course imma blog that day ;D LOls. Get updated though ;D Stay Focused&Be Positive Kids mmkays ?
So in AVID, we did a Mandala quick write. The question was :
"Who are the most specialist people to you and Why do they make them special ?".
This is what I wrote ..
The most specialist people to me are the F.A.S. group. We have 9 members in the group. My friends in the group are Hannah, Sylvia, Karyz, Zhane, Hao, Fa, Josh, Kenji and myself. We all been friends since 8th grade. For some of us, since 7th grade. The F.A.S. are special to me because they have been by my side for everything. We never go through anything a lone. F.A.S. is our family name. It stands for Fly Asian Society:) Karyz, my older brother and I made the name. We made it on January 27, 2009. So it has been almost 8 months in the making ! We all hang out on occasions so its fun. We support each other in everything and give the best advice ever. The 9 of us are all like brother's and sister's. They are my life. I would give up anything just to be wit them forever .. <3
This was a timed write and it may be short but it looks long on paper(x I would have wrote more but I think too much xD When I wrote this, I was remembering all those times we had when we were all together. Even though we may had 'those times' they still brighten up my day. They are the ones who have my back no matter what. They are the reasons why I go on wit my life each day. This topic made me realize who are my heroes. They are my true ones. I can go to them for anything. I finally found my family that appreciates everything I gave up for them. They know I gave up a lot in the past years and they would never take advantage of me. Unlike others, they would love to help me out in need. They aren't selfish, nor rude. If I would have to describe them, I would say 'family'. No matter what happens, its always&forever<3 know them. They proved themselves to me that I can trust them. We start developing with one another every time we hang out. So all those kick its, yes, they were what you may call 'stupid' but to us, its what we call having fun ;D So thas my story ..
AHA, funny how "Always&Forever" wasn't that long .. I won't forget all those things you said to me and did to me. Cause even though you hurt me, I still love you. You aren't realizing the real point in all of this. Cause you always block out the 'situation' even though I try to talk to you. Sure, your talking to me but thas not what I want to hear. I want to hear the truth. For me the truth, yesterday you really hurt me. Even though the first time was breaking up wit me but last night when I just wanted to let it all out, you just said it. I was thinking to myself "wtf, why did I even bother talking to him". But I knew I was going to be hurt because everything I do is just nothing to you. I make everyone happy but not myself. Helluh bothers me a lot though. &the fact that 'everything will be okay soon' won't even happen anymore. I thought everything would go back to normal but now, I dont think there is a chance. Aha, and I still have those messages on my phone. Why didn't I delete them ? Because I knew I should have something to remind me of you sooner or later. You walked out on me when things were rough. I dont blame you for anything because I should blame myself. I tried to get you back but you didn't let me in. It was not even worth my time. Thinking that you'll try to find your inner self and see all that is going on but now, you can't see the real meaning. Its true, I still do love you and you even know but you don't care. I dont blame you. Its your choice anyways. But its just easy nowadays to make me hurt because I break easily. Sure, crying doesn't do anything but it makes me let it all out in-a-way. I hoped, and I risk everything. I tried not to put all my hopes on "us" but I still did. Because you know why ? Because I thought there was a chance. But now, I guess its really .. over .. I missed how we used to be. I miss those times when we were still together. Sure, we had "fights" but it didn't get to us. We made up and continued on. Ate even misses those times we were being all 'lovey dove dove' together. Its also funny how the day you asked me out keeps popping up in my head. You know why I keep your stuff ? Because those are the only things that make me reminisce about those days. Do you still remember when we were together and you were still here ? All those stuff we did together. But still, no, I don't regret anything. Just the fact that I talked to you yesterday thinking 'everything will be okay' but then ended up crying. All I ask is to read all my blogs. They tell it all. I wouldn't want to tell you everything that I feel because you wouldn't care. No lie, everything you did for me was the best. Actually, you are the best. Thas why I wouldn't want to let you go. Its just hard knowing your over me. Even though Ate&Khaila&Danielle said to not give up, there is a part of me saying give up. But thas only like five percent. We were together for 9 months, 2 weeks&6 days. I actually thought we were going to make it. It was almost 10 months. Going to be a year sooner or later. This coming Saturday is the 19th of September. The supposedly '1 year' .. Aha, funny how we had plans and whatnot to come. With our relationship, I really knew what love was. I thought it was going to be true&worth it. It was. But was it true ? .. Even though we aren't together, it was. Everyone knew it was. They all knew we loved each other so much. Cause everything we told each other was the realest. I trusted you the most. You helped me out wit all my problems. I could talk to you about anything. My only wish, is that you can see the real thing im trying to say .. <3
So, fourth week down and five more weeks till second term. Today was nine eleven as you should all know. At school, we talked about it in all of my classes. School is okay so far. Trying to make the best of it. Freshman year in MTHS then the rest at hopefully Florin ? We'll see. WAS supposed to take a picture with Granddaughter but we can't find each other after school and whatnot. Anyways, this week went by fast cause of Monday, the holiday ;D AHAHA ! Funny ass day huh Ate ? Yawp. It felt weird though, I thought yesterday was Wednesday xD But yeah. My classes are okay - ish ? My grades are dropping to "B's" -_- Freakin' ghey ! UGH. I have to bring them up again. Stupid teachers with ghey ass homework. Besides that, im kinda getting a long wit other people now. Eating lunch nowadays with Granddaughter, Lena and sometimes Kido [Junnel]. I made my AVID Mandala project. It's due Monday but I finished like on Wednesday. It toke me almost two hours D; But worth it ;D I can't believe people think imma pro AHAHA ! Tanks to everyone who called me a pro though. Made me smile(: Imma post the picture on my other blog of course. Check it out ? ;D LOl. Hm ... What else to say .. SOB's birthday is coming up ! Imma get him something:) Teehee, cause he deserves something ;D LOl. I don't like him ! Just saying. To all the people who think that *ahem*ATE*ahem* :D Ahaha. So, today was successful. After school, I walked to Ate's house to kick it. They picked me up like when I was almost near their house cause they saw me walking(x Then we kicked it at Toby Johnson Park wit thatonedude cause he wanted to meet me and I wanted to meet him. He's okay .. FOR NOW. We'll have to see about next week. IF he comes next week cause I have plans. AHA. So, a lot has been going through my head lately. Just thinking about what happened and whatnot. Helluh ghey .. Ate&I cried like two nights ago ? We cry now and then .. We were having our 'deep conversation' on the phone. Then she told me to go on aim but when I did, I felt sleepy so I signed off on her ass(x Teehee. Im nice, yes I know:) Pictures are on my other blog ! Go check it out ;D So, how was your week sweetie ?(: Hm .. I guess thas all ? Stay Focused&Be Positive Kids mmkays ?
Heeeey Ate:) Happy birthday ! Hope your having a great day ;D Wish I can be with you right now but you know, we're far apart and all =/ Hope to see you soon ? Or in the future(x Either one would be nice ! OH YEAH, Philippines 2010:) LOl. Well, I just wanted to say, tanks for everythang you did for me. You've been there for my worst times to make me smile and I know I can go to you for anythang. I love you more than ever though ! Your the best I ever had :D Ahaha. Even though we only went to school together for 4 years, those were the best. When we were in the same Volleyball&Basketball team together, fun times(: I love you forever on ! Your indescribable but for me, the only way to describe you is that your my Ate forever. Teehee. Anyone messes' wit you, hit me up and I'll fck them up for you. Anythang for my Ate ! Duuuude, you give me the best advice ever ! LOl. I know your doing good there so keep it up. Ahaha. Man, your getting old Ate xD AHA ! Jkaaaay:) Pshaw, I need to give you your birthday gift when we meet up for the Philippines ;D Ahaha. &&we need to take helluh pictures ! We haven't had a picture together in agessss ! Since like .. Basketball&Volleyball days xD LOl. I still have those pictures btw ;D You make my day every time I talk to you. Its like you know how to make me smile:) Hehe. Gosh, only if I still lived in Daly City, I would go to the same school as you and kick it wit you like everyday ! That would be nice, won't it ?;) Ahaha. Well, I guess my birthday wish for you is that may all your wishes to come true. Well, one of them is ;D AHA ! You should know what that one is. Teehee. Thas all I wanted to say so take care Ate !
Well, just a lito shout out to my granddaughter. Hope you had fun today ;D Yay, your 14 xD Man, you still call me old though. Ahaha. Well yeah, my day was great tankyouverymuch:) So this morning, I watched ASAP '09 [filipino thang] and the Jabbawockeez performed ! It was the shit though. Worth waking up to ;D Pwuaha. It would be helluh cool if I was at ASAP live though. That would be like worth my trip to Philippines ahaha. Well, after that, my mom, brother, lito bro and I went to Fairfield. Going to Fairfield was helluh funny xD Kuya's smartness came to him. Mom : "You need to eat more squash for your eye sight" Kuya : "Can I just eat something else ?" Mom : "It needs to be a yellow vegetable" Kuya : "Yeah ill just eat an orange" ME : "LMFAO ! That aint a vegetable, thas a fruit &especially, that's an ORANGE ! LMFAO !" OMG, funnest shit ever ! xDD LOl. He helluh failed at that xD Then we listened to Rnb the whole way xD Well, until we reached Vacaville cause nothing good was one the radio. My brother and I were singing along xDD LOl. When we reached to Fairfield, Kuya drove to my cousins house. He's good at driving now. But im still scared when it's going to be us only cause Kuya is going to act stupid. Yes, I know im nice:) Ahaha. Well, when we reached Fairfield, Khaila&I thought of going to the mall so then we asked and Kuya Johnnon, Kuya, Pita, Khaila and I went to Fairfield mall. That was cool, I got to spend time wit my cousins:) Khaila&I were matching ;D We both wore a scarf that our Tita Achie gave us from Florida. Mine was purple and her's was blue of course ahaha. When we got to the mall, we went to Wet Seal cause Khaila was going to buy a vest but instead, we ended up looking at graphic tee's and whatnot for .. 30 min I suppose xD The clothes there were helluh cute ;D Teehee. I need to go shopping again. I haven't went shopping in a while. OH, there was this one shirt that was blue, had a baby chick on it and a crack egg. It said "Fail". LMAO. I helluh loved that shirt xD But instead, Khaila and Pita picked out a Hello Kitty shirt for me ;D Khaila decided to buy it for me cause "it shouted out my name":) Khaila bought a purple ninja shirt that says "who called the ninja's" xD It was tight. Ahaha. Then we noticed that we forgot about the vest she had to get so we started looking at the other side and in front. The vest were okay-ish but then Khaila didn't like them so yeah. She also bought shoes(x After that, we got a vanilla shake. It was the bomb :D Ahaha ! But then we had to go home cause my mom said we were leaving soon. BUT, we didn't leave yet(: When we came back, we all prayed of course. My Tito Gary cooked stake and whatnot. We had like a bunch load of food ! Khaila, Pita and I were waiting for the food to cook so we decided to look at the hello kitty site I looked at yesterday. THEN, Inspiration came ! Oliver decided to join us cause he thought it was interesting too lmfao. The food was cooked so we ate, toke pictures and video's. I don't have the video and pictures cause pita and my Tita Ada toke them wit there camera's so yeah(: I ate helluh though ! My stomach was so fuuuull when I came home xD We went home like at 8 cause Sebastian was getting sleepy. But today was the funnest day ever ! Next Saturday might be the same, I hope. Teehee. Well, im sleepy. Going to sleep&get rest for tomorrow's kick it wit the F.A.S. ladies:) Stay Focused&Be Positive kids mmkays ?
First is first, congratulations to my Ate&thatonedude. I know his name, I just like not calling him his name xD Yes, im nice:) Tankyouverymuch ! LOl. Anyways, I just helluh noticed .. Too many couples breaking up. Like .. 4 I believe. Aha, funny, im one of them .. Actually, two for me. [But not counting one] Its helluh weird. Stupid I should say. What ever happened to "Always&Forever". It was a lie. Wtheck though .. -_- I miss the old days .. I want to go back to the way it used to be .. He made me happy. He made me actually smile. I learned a lot from him. Did I do something for this to happen ?.. I would never know .. Until something [a miracle] happens. Almost 2 months since we broke up. 'Why are all the good couples breaking up !' _Ate. I know right Ate ? .. It was so great back then. What happens next ? A LOT ; Im moving. He won't talk to me. Mama might take the 'next step'. Are my prayers not enough ? What else do I have to do to help ?.. It's just sad looking at what happens next. Actually, I don't want to look at what happens next because of course I won't like it. Just one miracle and maybe .. Things will get back its way ? "There's always a rainbow after the rain." Why aren't I seeing it yet ? *Sigh* Things are just too difficult nowadays. I look at my friends life, they have it straight forward and they make it seem easy. Looking at my life ; my family, friends, problems. Its just too hard to make it complete now. I don't want to move because im already adjusting to MTHS and I really want to stay in this house. Yeah, the neighborhood is ghey ass hell but I love the memories that happened here. I really wish I can comprehend wit him again .. I really miss him. My life is just .. Not complete without him ? He made me realize how love really feels. It felt right and I didn't want it to let it go. I was reminiscing about when he was still here and when we were still together. I was actually happy about my life and nothing bad happened. Until he left to the Philippines. I don't blame him for that. Enough about that. The big issue that is going on is about my mama. She is having a hard time. Im praying really hard for her to get better. We all want her to get better. I feel so bad for her .. She was the one who I was talking about in my other blog. Khaila&I have a terrific plan ! When we grow up, we are going back to San Pablo and re-buy our old houses ! Especially mama's house:) We had so many memories there, we just want it all back. Yesterday, we were reminiscing about the old days .. Damn, we had a lot of good times. Then this question came to our mind , "if we were to stay there. if we didn't move. would we all be more successful ?" I would have to say yes. No worries. We are all together. Even though I wouldn't have met my terrific F.A.S. group, I would be with my family. No offense, I LOVE my F.A.S. group. They made my Elk Grove days, I mean YEARS, the best ever. I didn't think my life here would be this successful. But I love it now:) I never regret anything I did here. I love them forever on. Cause they were there for me through anythang. Anyways ; San Pablo was the best years ever. Straight up. *Sigh* I guess thas all I wanted to let out. Let's just say, I would want to go back in time and fix it up. One thing I learned from my life : Live your life to the fullest and have no regrets. Make it your best and make it fun. Well, I guess thas all. Stay Focused&Be Positive kids mmkays ?
Third week done, Fourth week coming, Five more weeks of first term and A LOT more days of school. Managing of course. So, this week was okay. I still think last week's was better:) I was supposed to make a 2 way cwalk wit Kido [8th grade, Art class nickname] but my camera died -_- AND we had like 1o mins ! UGH, stupid camera. Besides that, this week went by .. Pretty slow I guess. Finally Friday ; kicc it day ! My week of homework done and turned in. Grades are straight A's still. Hope they will stay that way. Just did a test, hope I pass. It was okay I guess. I was falling asleep though. Ugh, I need more rest nowadays. I do too much. But, worth it. High school pretty far is okay. I just need to focus on my grades than other stuff. My classes are still the same. Only second period makes me happy ;D HAHAs. You guys should know why, teehee. WELL, if you don't know .. Read my blogs and get caught up ! AHAHs. The only class I struggle in is English. Algebra 1 is okay so far. General Science is easy so far. AVID, I don't have to worry about;) LOl. GAHH, I don't want first period pe next term ! Helluh ghey -_- I don't remember what classes I have next term but all I know is that I have pe. OH, I also remember I still have third period lunch. I have three, three, four, four. <-- My lunch for the terms xD AHAHA. If we the same lunch period, hit me up though ;D Hm .. What else to say about my week .. Oh, I eat lunch wit gdaughter now. She needs someone to go eat lunch wit her. &she makes me sit wit her friends in the "Asian Table" LOl. It's all good though. Gambling involve. Of course, Asian's gamble every time. Isn't it true ? ;D I sometimes feel left out though cause they are all Viet and whatnot. But, oh well, im used to it. I guess thas all for school. One more thing, next week is Club Rush so I might join Photography Club &also on September 18 is the Freshman BBQ and after is the first football game so imma go ;D I just need to remind my parents xD Wanna come wit me ? Let's go though:) AHAHA. New Friend is ghey(x Buh nice, hehe. J&J are cool too. AHAHA. Well yeah. I make my parents happy wit my grades, makes me feel successful too. Trying to manage myself wit work and home. Especially wit my friends. Making sure I get to talk to them and hang out wit them so we get information wit each other. But have you noticed .. I don't have time for myself ? I make everyone happy and put myself last. I know, im nice:) I love making my family and friends happy. When I think about it .. They make me happy and that's all that I need. They are my life. They complete me. I love them oh so much. I can never be the same without them. Well, thas all for now. Gonna kicc it wit Ate ! &her soon-to-be Boofriend xD He is looking forward to meeting me today. LOl. Funny. Stay Focused&Be Positive kids mmkays ?
So, as you should know. Im moving. Imma miss this neighborhood .. I had helluh memories here. Even my friends did too. A lot of good memories mixed wit bad ones .. But overall, its sad how things are starting to fade away. I've been keeping track wit my grades and trying not to think about the past but everyday, I still do. No one can ever forget about the past. Because it happened. Even though I was sad back then but .. It felt better than how I feel now. Because I had a lot of time to tell them how much I care about them and how much I love them. They treated me so kind and they always had something to say when I felt bad. Even though I haven't been wit him for a long time, it felt like I knew him. My grandma was the best ! Even when I was lito, when I was crying, I would always go to her. Whenever something happened, I would always call her or go to her for help. She helped me through my "past times" made me feel better. She's so kind and helpful. I remembered everything. I will never forget those memories. I try to visit her on weekends wit my mom and brother but we are busy with finding a house. So now, we got a house ; I hope I get to see my grandma and my cousins more often. I miss seeing them everyday. I miss how things used to be when I was living wit them. Even though we had lito space, at least I was with them. I miss how I used to go to the same school as inspiration and Rec after school. I miss my old life. Because my old life made me realize how precious time is and that you should live it up to the fullest. Never back down cause there is always something ahead that will keep you going. Now, I see life as my own. I want what's best for me family, friends and of course, myself. Im trying to keep it together but I always seem to fail. Even at home, I get in trouble nowadays just cause of one simple thing. Its hard but im trying to manage. Im not "complaining", im just letting out my thoughts. I know, other people have harder lives than me so I shouldn't complain. Just to make it simple, if you tick me off one time, imma go off. I can't really control my anger no more. It's hard. Cause whenever im mad, I always have to hold it in. I never found anything to take out my anger yet. Probably just blogging and taking out my thoughts wit my Ate. Well, I guess that's it ? Gonna blog tomorrow of course to talk about my week. Stay Focused&Be Positive kids mmkays ?
There was a chance, and there still is. Should I take the risk again ? From me being happy to sad then happy again. Just thinking about it makes me so emotional. Is it worth a try ? I see that your happy in life and im happy for you too. But can't you see that im dying inside to know the answer to just one simple question I ask ? It's okay though, I understand. Everything is more important right now. I should just try to stop. But something is telling me to keep going and try again. There isn't any harm in trying. All that is scaring me is if I get hurt again [which I possibly am going to]. I just have that same feeling about you but I don't know if you still have it for me or for that other girl. You say she's just your best friend but what if it might be more ? Am I trippin' or what ? Sure, I may be jealous at a point but it won't get in my way. I'll just keep trying and see what there is.
